Flow and Balance

Yesterday was a good day and the networking meeting was fun!  I felt comfortable which is a good sign - it's all about meeting the right people for the right reasons.  I've never been one for commercialisation and I'm trying to make the whole experience manageable for me.  I had a few emails to deal with afterwards and then some playing work came in for next week as well as a rescheduled wedding fair (March snow) and all this has now shaped the end of this week and next.  I did a 6am shift today and have accepted another one for tomorrow which puts me in good stead for a focused harp week next week - I have rehearsals and 2 performances.  This is all trial and error and about finding some sort of sustainable general balance.  It's GREAT to have the shift work to fall back on and I am enjoying it more and more!  Today I was on a lovely line with small brown bottles which I had to unpack while checking for any breakages, and lay them on a rotating stainless steel surface which gently eased the bottles onto a conveyor belt one by one.  I started somewhat clumsily with 4 bottles, and soon I was moving 10 bottles at once.  (Update 11/5 - today I was greedily managing up to 15 at a time and no breakages - go me).  On my first day at the factory I felt overwhelmed by the whole experience, it really was sensory overload.  A fortnight and 6 shifts later I noticed a significant improvement.  The previously oppressive pulsating throb of the machinery sounded like a hypnotically rhythmic heartbeat this morning.

I know I'm in the throes of a phase of transformation in my life.  Lately I have felt the lure of a regular job.  Yikes!  There's something very attractive about the financial security and routine of a "proper job" involving a 10 minute drive down the road during quiet driving times, and the thought of a weekend off after a busy week is a strong motivation.  I also get a pension!  It satisfies some of the loneliness that comes with freelancing - at the factory I'm surrounded by people.  But, who am I kidding?!!  I love the freedom of freelancing too much!  And what would I do without the harp and music?  I think I'm slightly delusional so time for an early night, 3 hours sleep isn't ideal and has been the norm over the past fortnight...